Can Ramps Cure the Seven Year Itch?

Ramp Queens, April 15, 2014

For more than 140 years Lucida Ransom’s Ramp Vegetable Cure has been restoring women to good health… even from the Seven Year Itch

antiseptic-kiss
“I suffered for seven long years with a lame back and painful troubles during my womanly times every month.

But the main issue was, I had recently experienced great pains through out my entire posterior every time my poor husband came into the room. So much so, I could not perform my wifely duties!

Concerned friends told me it was the normal “Seven Year Itch”* that is common to so many wedded couples.  But my husband thought not – so we sought professional treatment.

We visited one physician after another but they did me no good.  One very handsome quack  blamed it on my having ‘sexuline female hysteria’ and offered to personally see to my treatments himself.

Unfortunately, my husband refused to pay – despite my passionate desire to see what the physick had to offer!

I was at my wit’s end until I read about Lucida Ramson’s Ramp Vegetable Cure. After reading about it online, that very night I purchased 2 bunches of ramps and cooked
up a wonderful dish.

My pain cleared up almost immediately – I felt so good the next day that continued to cook up a new recipe every night.

I resumed my wifely duties with so much vigor and vitality that my husband was astonished.

I continued to cook and eat the Ramp Vegetable Cure several times a day – especially if I felt ‘frisky’ towards my spouse.

Why within three week’s time, I had never felt better in my life and my nearly exhausted husband had removed himself from our bedroom vowing not to return – until after ramp season was over!

That was over 15 years ago… and now 5 children and one blissful husband later – I still enjoy robust good health – (no more sexuline female hysteria) – and I owe it all to the Ramp Vegetable Cure.  ~ Mrs. Minnie Needs, Alotmore, NC

*The sevenyear itch is a psychological term that suggests that happiness in a relationship declines after around year seven of a marriage.

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